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Tag: happiness

Ways to Avoid the Agony of Holiday Shopping

When I was a child, I learned conflicting gifting skills from my parents. Here’s how I’ve tried to modify their methods to become more effective in how I shop today.

While I was growing up, I watched my mother shop for presents with an intensity that demonstrated long hours and an incredible commitment to find the perfect gift at the best price. Her process inevitably generated great results, but it must have been exhausting for her.

My father’s shopping style couldn’t have been more opposite. He picked up his gifts with a seemingly effortless flair. He’d walk into a store and pick up an item in what seemed like seconds. It was glorious to watch him in action. And they often seemed to be nifty presents… but not always.

As a kid who occasionally accompanied my parents while they shopped, I preferred my father’s methodology. But I saw my dad’s shopping success through the eyes of a child. You can’t just magically wait till the last minute, and waltz into a store to get exactly what you want. Or can you?

My mom never had the opportunity to apply her analog hunting and gathering strategies to online shopping. I think she would have enjoyed the opportunity to endlessly compare prices and sales. But as we all know, all that data can create a crippling shopping cycle where you never get to the finish line.

I am a product of both these shopping styles, and I carry the inherent burdens of both.

Fact Vs. Fiction
As you might expect, shopping during holiday seasons has been complex for me across the decades. I’ve instinctively applied certain shopping ideals that are usually impossible to follow.

  • Decide on the perfect gift
  • Perform exhaustive online research
  • But do it quickly
  • Find it on sale at the best price
  • Expect it to show up the next day at no extra cost if ordered online

Here’s a more realistic version.

  • It’s hard to find the perfect gift, unless you’re shopping for a requested item
  • Spotting the best price is also challenging, because discounts occur all year long
  • Taking tons of time to browse for gifts doesn’t always result in finding the right present
  • However, minimal effort is also a mediocre strategy
  • Shipping delays happen

Less is More
We all know that holiday shopping is an artificial construct designed by the marketing machine to keep the economy humming. It’s stressful, because you’re always feeling pressure to quickly make purchasing decisions with a deadline looming.

Giving and receiving is supposed to be fun. How can we reduce all the related frenzy and find more of the joy this season is constructed to be?

Well, spending less time shopping is probably a good start. Browsing for random deals is a huge time suck. You’ve really got to know what you’re looking for.

At Home with Existing Tech?
And if that special person asks you what you might want for a gift, and you’re not craving anything, that’s okay. (That doesn’t mean you’re ‘ungiftable.’)

For me, I think it’s been something of a slow year when it comes to wanting the latest and greatest tech. Still, I must admit, there are a few items out there
I wouldn’t mind receiving. For example…

  • A Self-Directed Drone for Swooping Cinematic Shots
    The DJI Neo is a tiny, automated drone that that you don’t have to fly yourself. It doesn’t need a controller and will simply circle its human subject using pre-programmed flight plans to record awesome 4K cinematic shots. The Neo takes off from your hand and then does the rest on its own. It’s like hiring your own drone crew to capture the ending of your personal movie… all for only $199. That’s a great price point. ($289 will get you 3 batteries and a charging hub.)

But I digress…

Less Browsing, More Planning
Like it or not, we’re all probably doing some holiday shopping. Just don’t overdo the browsing part. Focus more on the planning and deciding parts.

If you have a plan that takes some effort, it’s okay to go for it.

I’ll never forget the great gift I received when I was seven years old. My mother bought me my first audio cassette recorder that she couldn’t afford using promotional stamps.

She saw my interest and found a way to fuel it. Her gifting me that communications tool was a seminal moment in my timeline. Without it, my later life in professional video production may not have evolved. (Yes, if you wanted to time travel to change my life, I think that’s a clear juncture point.)

The Perfect Gift
This little tape recorder was the best present my mom ever gave me. And she spent months working on it. But doesn’t her process seemingly break the rules of moderation I’m now trying to follow as an adult?

Let’s review her strategy:

  • My mom had a plan
  • She spent a lot of time on it, but she didn’t waste any time shopping
  • And she effectively received a 100% discount on the purchase

It was, in fact, the perfect shopping execution for the best gift I ever received.

There’s Always a Sale
Again, the lesson here is to have a strong intention before you begin any shopping. (I’m trying really hard these days to follow this wisdom.)

Don’t be distracted by the hundreds of items on sale. It’s not about the sale. That can lead you down the wrong path and hours of wasted time.

First commit the time to consider what the person might like. Once you’ve completed that step, the rest will follow.

Then, go find your sale. It’ll be there waiting for you.

Because that’s how the system works.

5 Ways to Quickly Free Yourself from the Shackles of Digital Clutter

Is your digital life a bit of a disorganized mess? The best gift you can give yourself is carving out time to get it back in recognizable order.

You’ve got it all done. For your family, friends and work. Another year. Congratulations. Everyone says it’s now time to take a break and recharge. Relax!

But if you’re like me, you might be experiencing a certain unease… an uncomfortable itch. It’s like that feeling when you know you’ve forgotten something, but you can’t remember what. But this time, you do. And you’ve continued to put it off, because there’s always something else more pressing.

Now, you hear this nagging inner voice that whispers. It says, “Do it. Do it now. You’ve finally got time.”

Of course, we’re taking about handling all the digital disorganization that piles up throughout the year in the invisible but very real corners of your life. No one else can see it. But you know it’s there. Sure, you’ve been able to operate around it, but it’s ever heavy, and it weighs on you.

The Journey to Digital Zen
Do you want to feel refreshed? Recharged? Really ready for the year ahead? It’s time to invest in a little digital housecleaning. Start the journey to digital Zen.*
Now is the perfect opportunity, as you might have a little more free time in your day.

Here are five areas that I bet could really use your attention right now:

#1
Organize your Digital Photos from the Past Year
Whether your pictures live on your smartphone or computer (or both), if you haven’t yet finished going through this year’s crop and completing your photo-management process (physical albums/online albums/digital photo frames), it’s going to be too late.
Sure, you can tell yourself that you’ll eventually get to them, but they’ll likely get left behind, as your newer photos demand your attention.

#2
Delete All those Emails You Don’t Need
Can’t find that email from last week you want to refer to? It could be due to those thousands of disorganized emails that are cluttering up your inbox. It’s time to get rid of most of them and move the other ones into organized folders!
And don’t forget to also clear out your Junk Email folder (but not before you review it to confirm that real emails haven’t been errantly sucked in).

#3
Remove Old Photos and Videos from your Camera’s Memory Card
If you happen to still use a separate camera, I bet its memory card is looking mighty full. Do you often find yourself frantically trying to delete enough files at the last minute before you need to use your camera? (Yes, that’s me.) It’s time to make that problem go away. Go through that memory card and really free it up!

#4
Clear Out your Unnecessary Cloud Storage
Speaking of memory limits, I bet you’re paying more for your cloud storage these days. Sure, the cloud holds much more than a memory card, but it still has its own limits. Do you really need everything that’s currently in your Dropbox account or iCloud drive?

#5
Slim Down What’s Stored on your Computer’s Internal Drive
Not to be repetitive, but I bet your computer suffers from the same storage woes. Look, you just can’t save everything on your internal drive. And now that newer internal computer drives are the more-pricey SSDs, your current computer probably has less internal storage than your last one.

Gone are the days that you can simply upgrade to your next computer with double the capacity to keep up with your needs.

Portable Drives are Not a Permanent Solution
Yes, you can solve some of these problems by picking up reasonably priced portable drives and archiving your digital life onto them. But hoarding external drives and redirecting your disorganized digital content onto them is simply kicking the virtual can down the road.
What are you going to do a decade from now when you open your closet door, and you spot fifty drives in the back corner? That’s right. You’re going to close the door.

Game over.

The Limits of your Digital Life
Wait. Take a deep breath. Now exhale.

We’re all dealing with the same challenges. In fact, we’re really the first generation to go through this.

The reality is you can’t carry around a record of your complete digital existence throughout your life. We’re only a few decades into this challenge, and I feel we’ve already reached certain limits. Our kids are going to have to figure out how to handle three to four times as much!

But I’m getting ahead of myself. For now, let’s just do what we can. If it’s only a quick fix, that’s okay.

A digital band-aid is better than nothing to slow the hemorrhaging.

The Road to Freedom
Ongoing file organization and strategic file deletion should be part of any long-term strategy for a healthy digital life. And ultimately, as in the physical world, less is more. Clutter in any form is a real drag.

If you invest some time every few months to keep your digital life in order, you’ll likely feel more control over your entire life.

And especially during this time of year, I say why not invest in yourself and start to free yourself from the shackles of all that digital clutter?
You’ll be happy you did!

*I generated my photos for this blog post via Adobe Firefly.

A Father’s Reflections after his Son’s Bar Mitzvah

Yesterday reflects a course adjustment for my family that’s three generations in the making. Here’s why.

Our son had his bar mitzvah yesterday. He was amazing, even if I am a little biased.

He was prepared. He was relaxed. He hit it out of the park. For someone who doesn’t exactly crave the spotlight, he appeared relatively Zen.

My wife and I are so proud of him. This was his day in every way.

A Return to a Family’s Tradition
It also represented a major shift in the timeline for my family. It’s the first bar mitzvah in my immediate family in three generations. I didn’t have one, and neither did my father. But both sides of my family came from observant Jewish ancestors. So yesterday was a definite reset.

I couldn’t be happier.

Our son now has the foundation that I never received growing up. And as a young adult, I began to recognize the gap. That choice my parents made for me to not have a bar mitzvah is part of a much larger conversation about their perception of Jewish identity during those decades.

Suffice to say, it’s usually best to fully embrace who you are so you can fully become who you are meant to be.

I’m the bridge. My son is the future. What he decides to do with his foundation is up to him. But now he’s got it…

Seven Minutes of Pure Joy
At our son’s party, my wife and I wanted everyone to dance the traditional hora with us and lift up our son on a chair like you often see at Jewish celebrations. And that’s exactly what we did.

Watching him float up there was glorious. Then my wife went up, and finally it was my turn.

It was magical. I felt weightless. Time slowed down as I spun around in the clouds.

Family and friends were laughing, clapping and smiling. All of that love and support flowed around me and through me.

I will never forget the feeling.

Taking It All In
Yes, the feeling of an entire community’s warm support at our Congregation Beth El earlier in the day.

That knowledge that you were participating in one of the happiest days of your life.

And the love of family and friends, some who drove far through an all-day pummeling rain storm to be with you.

It was a special day.

Positive Momentum
Oh yes… Did I mention that we got an inch of rain yesterday? And of course, it derailed our outdoor plan A for the evening party. But we had a great indoor plan B.

There was simply too much momentum going. There could be no wash out.

As the evening party rocked inside, I occasionally glanced at the torrential rain outside.. And I smiled.

It was exactly as it was meant to be. And it was perfect.

My Message to the Universe
I don’t think you get many days like yesterday. So when they come along, it’s important to be as present as you can be to take it all in. That’s the advice I received, and I followed it!

I’m also finding it useful to write about it a bit to help seal in all of that joy.

So, I sat at my desk during my magic hour this morning. I reflected with my cup of Joe to the left of my keyboard. And the above is what flowed out.

And now I upload my story to the universe. I send it to the past. I send it to the future.

Everything feels right.