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Category: Tech Diary

March 31, 2024

What the Heck is Happening in the Sci-Fi Series Constellation?

If you want to understand what’s going on in this Apple TV+ show, you’d better pay attention to all the details. And that may not be enough. Here’s my review.

Confusion abounds. Reality warps. It’s hard to keep track of all the fleeting clues. Watching science fiction was so much easier when Spock had a beard.

Spoiler Alert: Yes, the Apple TV+ series “Constellation” suggests a multiverse. There, I’ve said it. But this is no Marvel movie. Yes, it’s starts in space on the International Space Station. No, there are no aliens. Yes, things get weird.

Actually, the writers of this eight-episode show would probably be angry with me for wrongly connecting this tale to the multiverse. It’s about quantum entanglement. There, now I’ve said that.

Every Detail Matters
Either way, before you know it, you don’t know what’s going on. Nothing makes sense.

Across this first season’s arc, the writers slowly fill in key details that help you figure out what’s really happening. Barely.

“Constellation” plays more like a mystery than sci-fi. But you’d better know your science fiction. And while you’re at it, bring along your understanding of science facts too (especially your knowledge of the end of the Apollo space program).

And you’ve got to pay attention. Really pay attention. The truth is out there, but it’s hard to keep everything straight in this wonky, reality-bending family-focused story.

Family Crisis
The family in question is our astronaut hero Jo played by Noomi Rapace, her often-frustrated husband played by James D’Arcy and their precocious and ‘Force’-sensitive ten-year-old daughter played by twins Davina Coleman and Rosie Coleman. (The casting itself is a plot giveaway.)

Sure, the pressures of modern life can wear on a family unit, and many movies explore this space. But the story brings new meaning to the phrase, “I don’t know you anymore.”

There’s also a former astronaut played by Jonathan Banks running a secret experiment on the ISS. He seems to have all the answers, like the Cigarette Smoking Man from “The X-Files.”

Reality is Not a Constant
The series begins with an accident on the ISS and Jo’s harrowing escape. But when she gets back home, it’s not exactly the same. Certain details have changed.

By the end of the disturbing first season which mostly takes place on terra firma, after hours of a drip-drip, wash and repeat story-telling structure, it does finally come into a partially satisfying focus. Barely.

“Constellation” takes it time and throws a lot of genres at you. Science fiction, mystery, suspense and even a dash or horror.

It’s different. I’ll give it that.

Did I like it? I’m not sure. Maybe. Perhaps some version of me did. (Ha ha.)

Yes, it’s well done, and the actors are great. But the filmmakers really needed to leave a few more crumbs along the way for less detail-oriented viewers to follow (guilty).

Will There be a Season 2?
And I’ve got to say that the traditional season-ending cliffhanger is particularly frustrating here when there’s no guarantee there will be a second season. (As of this post, a second season of “Constellation” has not been announced.)

Maybe it would be better if it all ends right here. Episodic mysteries that involve science fiction often have a difficult time getting to their own finish lines in a completely satisfying way. It’s all about the mystery… not the pay off. And that’s often a problem.

“Lost” got lost. “The X-Files” never really wanted to find the truth.

Houston, We have Another Problem
“Constellation” could be different. Who knows. But the producers need a green-lit second season, if we’re ever going to find out.

Of all the many remaining loose ends, the most disturbing one for me is the Apollo program inconsistency the show doesn’t even acknowledge is a reality-bending problem.

Do you want a real spoiler?

Two words. Apollo 18.

Enough said.

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March 24, 2024

How to Slow Down the Inevitable End for your Beautiful Tech

Yes, I immediately ruined the sleek beauty of my new Apple Watch by strapping a protective bumper over it. Was that necessary? Here’s what happened the very next day…

Design is a key element for the look of your personal tech. Sure, how your gear works is important, but it sometimes feels like style supersedes function.

So, if a piece of technology is designed to look beautiful, covering it up can be viewed as something of an insult. Or at the very least, you’re certainly not cool.

But the reality we move through every day doesn’t usually contain smooth edges and gleaming surfaces, unmarred by the brutality of existence. Wearing expensive and beautiful personal tech in an unpredictable and messy world creates inevitable danger for your devices.

Let me count the ways I’ve put my tech in harm’s way.

Projectile AirPod
During the latter part of the pandemic, I was walking to work from Grand Central Terminal wearing my Apple AirPods. When I stepped into the crowded office elevator ten minutes later, I temporarily popped on a face mask.

As I exited the elevator onto my floor, I quickly pulled off my mask. That was a mistake.

One of the mask’s ear loops caught the left AirPod, and a rubber-band effect propelled it forward into the elevator-bank hallway.

My AirPod flew towards the wall and hit it hard (with a horrible ‘ping’ impact). It ricocheted onto the floor and then skidded about like a glass marble. I chased after it in horror.

Somehow, my tiny AirPod seemed undamaged.

Apple Watch Scarface
Five years ago, I bought my first Apple Watch. Of course, I immediately bought a plastic bumper for it, which provided a protective raised edge.

I had to ruin my Apple Watch’s sleek beauty in the name of common sense. I often whack my wrist on objects. I felt the watch would simply never survive.

And for years, the bumper worked just fine. Then one day, I looked at my watch to check the time, and I saw a diagonal scratch on its face. There had been no impact that I could recall. The silent attack obviously came head on and avoided the bumper.

It would have been a more crushing moment had it occurred earlier in my Apple Watch’s life, but it was still annoying.

That said, I often spot people living with mutilated smartphones, the spider-cracks spanning entire screens. And these people act oblivious to the damage, since the screens somehow continue to function. (But I know they must be crying inside.)

My Apple Watch’s singular scratch was a laughable inconvenience by comparison.

OtterBox Bumper
I finally said goodbye to that scratch when I recently upgraded to my new Apple Watch Series 9.

And this time, I not only bought a bumper to protect my new Apple Watch’s edges, I found a model with a built-in screen protector. Yes, please!

While not exactly inexpensive, I think the OtterBox Eclipse is well worth its cost for the added screen protection.
So, I popped on the Eclipse. A warm feeling of invincibility washed over me (silly human).

A Danger at Every Corner
The very next day, I walked up to my closet to pull out my sneakers. I used my left hand, which was sporting my new Apple Watch. My hand almost imperceptibly brushed against the door frame’s edge as it moved in for my sneaks, which were jammed in the left corner.

An hour later, my heart skipped a beat when I realized there was a long horizontal scratch by the OtterBox’s lower edge.

What?! This is day 2 for my new Apple Watch! And I’ve ruined it already?!

I looked closer…

Phew. The scratch was actually on the OtterBox case… not the Apple Watch. (Yay OtterBox!)

And it wasn’t a scratch. It was a whisper-thin line of paint that had rubbed onto the case from my painted door frame as my wrist brushed by.

Was my brand-new OtterBox case now permanently scarred? Not necessarily.

Scrub Up
I quickly set up a mobile tech repair station on my dining room table with a bottle of rubbing alcohol and a folded strip of paper towel. I dabbed an edge of the paper towel into the rubbing alcohol and then very gently ran it over the line of paint on my OtterBox case.

It was critical not to overexpose the OtterBox case to the rubbing alcohol as it could ruin the case’s finish. And of course, I knew not to touch the screen protector with the rubbing alcohol. (I’m not a chemist, but I didn’t want to discover how quickly I could do even more damage.)

My light-touch strategy worked. The paint disappeared, and my OtterBox case looked like new. Life was good again.

Have a Repair Plan
One more word: AppleCare.

You can cover up your tech all you like. Sometimes that’s not going to be enough to protect it. You might say that damage is inevitable. It’s just a matter of when and how.

You can’t control everything, and that’s okay.

No, it’s not a good idea to catapult your AirPod onto a marble wall. Try not to drop your smartphone on a cement sidewalk or whack your Apple Watch onto what feels like a diamond-edged wall corner.

But when you do, having paid a little more for a repair plan certainly helps.

Bumpers for Bumps
After AI takes over the world, I expect personal tech design will no longer focus on physical beauty. I imagine the iPhone 45 may be a gruesome-looking device with sharp wires fused to our skin like a Star Trek Borg interface.

Until then, we must endure the limits of sleek and delicate design for our personal tech and do our best to protect against the bumps of daily existence.

Otherwise, your gear’s ‘End of Life’ may come sooner than you’d prefer.

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March 17, 2024

How Long Should an Apple Watch Last?

I didn’t plan on buying a new Apple Watch. But fate had a different directive. Here’s how you might want to better integrate the inevitable into your home-tech upgrade planning.

Last summer, my old iPhone drowned. It was the result of my little kayaking adventure mishap. (With a spectacular demonstration of clumsiness, I slipped on a submerged rock and fell into knee-deep water as I was getting out of my kayak.) My iPhone was only submerged for a moment, but it was enough.

I later rushed it to the Apple Store as my iPhone struggled to boot up, but it was too late. They called it as my iPhone lay on the cold table, surrounded by Apple Geniuses. One reviewed the diagnostic. It was hopeless. R.I.P. my dear iPhone.

Don’t Wait for the Tragic Last Day
I’ve thought a bit about that day since then. And I’ve come to realize that human error may not have been entirely to blame for this tech tragedy. My almost five-year-old iPhone XS Max had been acting a bit glitchy.

Earlier in the summer, it had exhibited charging anomalies. When I plugged it in, the screen complained about moisture in the charging port. (Yes, it had been raining earlier.) Of course, I was concerned that it wouldn’t charge for hours at a time. So, I took it to the Apple Store. My iPhone received a clean slate.

Fast forward a couple months. My iPhone was dead.

Coincidence? Not necessarily. But in hindsight, perhaps my five-year-old device was simply getting old and beginning to reach its natural end.

Tech doesn’t last forever.

Maybe waiting for the very end is always going to end in some tragic way.

The Logic Board in my Apple Watch Series 4
Let me tell you a different story. It’s about my old Apple Watch Series 4 that’s also five years old. Guess what? It had also been acting glitchy.

It was inexplicably crashing every so often and rebooting. And then its battery suddenly couldn’t power it through even one day. (I knew Apple Watch batteries don’t last forever, but this was a sudden change.)

So, I recently took it to the Apple Store. And the Apple Genius attempted to do a diagnostic. That process required my own iPhone (now a mighty iPhone 15 Pro Max) to do the health check with its linked companion.

My aging Apple Watch wouldn’t cooperate, and even though it was still successfully paired to my iPhone, it wouldn’t let my iPhone do the diagnostic.

Is that bad? Yeah, it’s bad.

The Apple Genius shook his head, looked at me and said my Apple Watch would have to be sent out for repair, and that cost could range from $99 for a new battery to over $200. And then he said the dreaded ‘L’ word.

“It’s probably a logic board problem.”

Logic board?! My Apple Watch was long past its Apple Care days. The likely cost to repair this old piece of tech would simply not be worth it.

So, I called it. Goodbye dear Apple Watch.

One piece of good news: I received $70 to trade in my failing Apple Watch for a new Apple Watch Series 9.

Five Years is Enough
No, this wasn’t as traumatic an experience as my iPhone story. Of course, I knew that I might need to buy a new Apple Watch. I was prepared for that likelihood.

I got five years out of my Apple Watch. That’s a good run… I think.

You have to remember that newer software will inevitably slow down old hardware. And eventually, you won’t be able to even update the software on an Apple Watch. And who really wants to go through that? Even if you’re a glutton for that kind of punishment, the hardware can/will also fail eventually.

Gone are the days when you can maintain your grandparent’s watch forever. Certainly not with an Apple Watch.

Plan for the Inevitable
Yes, wearing an Apple Watch is a relatively expensive way to know what time it is. (Of course, Apple Watches do much more than that. And obviously, I enjoyed my first Apple Watch enough to get another one.)

We all know what the Apple ecosystem costs. No surprises there. This is more about better understanding recommended replacement cycles.

Give Yourself Enough Time for a Smooth Transition
If there’s a lesson learned from my past year of Apple upgrades (I also recently bought a Mac Studio to replace my old iMac), it’s not to squeeze every last day out of your tech to get the most value from your original spend.

Three years? Four? Maybe five years? After that, I think you’re asking for trouble. And when the early signs of obsolescence show up, don’t dismiss them as minor inconvenience.

Sure, you can always choose to upgrade much faster to get the latest and greatest. And I think that’s fine if you feel a compelling reason to do that.

But if you’re happy with what you’ve got, just remember the status quo can’t last forever.

It’s always best to upgrade your tech while you still have the choice. Emergency technology purchases can really make anyone nauseous.

The Silver Lining
Happily, this time, upgrading to my new Apple Watch was a smooth experience that I was prepared for.

And of course, the silver lining when you’re forced to upgrade is that you get all the benefits of your newer tech.

Welcome home, Apple Watch Series 9!

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