Ode to iPhone 6 Plus

by Barrett

I opened up the box cradling my preordered iPhone 6 Plus, turned it on and then activated the giant monster.  Finally, I put it in my front pocket (barely) and decided… It’s time to write some poetry!

I opened up the box cradling my preordered iPhone 6 Plus, turned it on and then activated the giant monster. Finally, I put it in my front pocket (barely) and decided… It’s time to write some poetry!

First, there was my sad Ode to iPhone 5.
Then came the mournful Ode to the End of BlackBerry.
And now, in what has become my annual contribution to tech poetry,
(…is there such a thing?)
I present my next ‘poem.’
(and it’s a bit more upbeat…)

Plus

You are so large
Your face so bright
I can’t believe
My very sight

I’ve been waiting
For oh, so long
My old 4S
Its sheen long gone

Starting from China
I’ve tracked your journey
Alaska to the east coast
The plane flies in a hurry

I have chosen you
I own a phablet
You’re kind of awkward
But you’re no bandit

Will you really bend?
I imagine you can
But why would I think
You’re as tough as batman?

You are not perfect
I do understand
What tech is so strong
Life’s force to withstand?

iOS 8 glitches
I should expect a few
Just wait a couple weeks
Updates will make you new

Once just a phone
For my mobile convenience
Now I carry
The power of near sentience

A gadget from Star Trek
Can help you feel clever
But there is no ‘Corbomite’ here
No Guardian of Forever

Still, I will protect you
You are my only friend*
Your screen displays my world
Oh, you can never end!**

For a moment in life
I’m cutting edge and cool
It’s only good timing***
Because I sometimes drool****

So is my Plus a must?
It really does dazzle
I am now so pumped up
Thanks to mighty Apple

*I needed the extra two beats. I’ve got a couple of friends.
** Feel free, as long as AppleCare is fully in force.
***Yes, I was the first geek to bring it to the staff meeting last week.
****Another rhyming requirement. Okay… I may drool a wee bit in my sleep.

Advertisements